Tag Archives: sleep

#69. Saturday

By: Devin Kira Murphy

It was Saturday,
In faked it was the Saturday after Judy’s return home from Boston after her successful finishing of exams
It was Saturday,
In faked it was the Saturday when she was to finely throw out that rotten spam casserole, the one that was still in her frig
It was kind of strange for Judy to have a spam casserole in her frig seeing as she’s vegetarian
It was Saturday,
In faked it was the Saturday when Judy would start her day of as always, but for one difference
The difference was to be that she would have some white wine with her cereal
Cereal, Judy always starts her day of with cereal, “Jane Fox’s Foxy Homemade Granola Mix” to be precise (well ever sins she gave up on Fruit Loops)
It was Saturday,
It was the Saturday when she would get drunk on white wine and then…
Well then she would have her old high school friends Samantha and Erin over for a good time
Well it was Saturday again,
Well it was to be the Saturday after the Saturday when Judy’s high school friends Samantha and Erin came over to her home
In faked it was to be the Saturday when Judy would wake up in her bed clinging lovingly to her high school friends Samantha and Erin, with the realization that they had never left…


#26. Judy Is Erasable

By: Curtis Murphy

Who is this woman?
Why is she in my brain?
Why is she in my dreams?
Those dreams I have, those rare times when I have sleep, instead of having no sleep
Damn this no sleep, damn my bad fro
Damn those flashes of red hair, and big feet, and mysterious lime-green garments
They dazzle me, and make my shins twitch with their grotesque beauty
Damn those waves that crash up against the rocky shores of my homeland, reminding me of the time I got a concussion, from her excessively heavy petting
Oh, I am tormented, by this lost love of mine
I am haunted by the echo of those fateful words YOU BITCH…you bitch…you bitch
He called her a bitch, and I got angry at him
Even though deep down, I knew he was right
And I knew that she was left
Yes, she had left me
And I was going to find her
All I had to do was follow my fro…

#25. Glenn Falls Into A Disillusioned State Of Mined

By: Devin Kira Murphy

Glenn was in Peterborough attending the CUC’s Annual General Meeting as a delegate for his congregation
He was there voting on many CUC resolutions but,
But that was until the caffeine he had consumed to help him stay awake wore off, leaving him to fall into a disillusioned state of mind
He had needed the caffeine not just to help him function in an alert state at the CUC’s Annual General Meeting, but to stay awake at CanUUdle the CUC’s annual national youth conference witch he was attending in the evenings and at nighttime
The sudden lack of caffeine in his system caused him to start to hallucinate
He hallucinated that he was God and that he was able to change voting delegates’ votes with his godly powers
He even thought he was able to turn delegates in to talking cows and make them wear pink tutus with his godly powers
But Glenn had to be hauled out of the voting room wen we started yelling “I can make you all nude ‘cause I am God almighty!”
He was hold out to the places ware he was staying, the Peterborough church
When he got there he proceeded to tell all the other youth how much fun it was to be God and if he killed himself he could bring himself back to life
Wen others asked him who he could do this he said “because I am God almighty, YOU IDIOTS!”
That’s when things got worse for Glenn
He went to the church’s kitchen grabbed a knife and pointed it at himself and yelled “watch me kill myself!”
But before he could one of the adults who was acting as a youth advisor intervened and stopped Glenn from committing suicide
But that was not the end of Glenn’s troubles
You see as the advisor grabbed the knife from his hands he hit his head against the wall and fell in to a coma
Glenn was rushed to Peterborough General Hospital and to this day he has not regained consciousness

P.S. We all wish Glenn a speedy recovery

#18. Slumber

By: Devin Kira Murphy

Four, four on the floor, with a whore
Gore, gore, snore, snore, no not going to slumber ‘cause…
‘Cause in slumber I have nightmares
In slumber I see Judy in a lime green body suit and that scares me to the core of my soul
No don’t go to slumber ‘cause then I will have no one to talk to and subsequently I will then enter slumber
In slumber I see Judy in a lime green body suit
Four, four on the floor, with a whore
There are four, four on the floor, with a whore

#2. No Sleep, Fro Sleep

By: Devin Kira Murphy & Joel Fox

I tried to sleep but I just got a bad, bad fro
It went up, up, up
down, down, down
Sleep or no sleep
I was having cookies with big bird or was it with Rob at the side of the road with a rubber cucumber?
…staring blankly into space…
…feeling music in brain…
Oh no!
This no sleep is giving me bad fro or is it bad fro giving me no sleep?
Bad fro…
No sleep…
Side of road…
Rubber cucumber…
doing me no good there better not be a barbecue nearby because I don’t want barbecuecumber
What is that fro doing with Rob?
I thought it was my fro
No sleep
Fro sleep
Oh me!
Oh my!
Oh Why!

P.S. Wake me up, Judy-and, again, you still haven’t told me- who the hell is Frank?