Tag Archives: letter

#40. Misinformation

By: Devin Kira Murphy

Dear Clowie
We got some misinformation
We wear toled the con was in Utica, wen infant it was being held in Halifax
We thought it was kind of strange because wasn’t Utica band from holding cons for a will after the random three in the morning redecorating of their sanctuary with mas amounts of red pant and fabric which was don using caleche tec -neak at their last con
But of to Utica we went anyway
We had to vans full of people
We wear excited and raring to go, it had been far to long sins the last con
Wen we got to the border and poled up to the border garred’s booth, we wear asked to pullover
The border garred expand that he was just going to search us all
After the border garred had searched us and had fund nothing, we wear allowed to craws the border
All the way to Utica we wear unable to find any eatery that was open,
So we got hungry vary hungry
Wen we pulled up to the church, which we had some problems finding, we fund their was nothing going on and the hole places was dark,
So we called the Toronto congregation on advisor Tavish’s cell, ‘cause they always no what is going on
But we got no response,
So we waited in the Utica church parking-lot till morning,
Wen we got a call from a Halifax youth named Aaron telling us that someone must have given us some misinformation and we were supposed to be in Halifax, ‘cause the con was being held their
So we then tolled Aaron that it was to late for us to be able to get to the con before it ended and we went and got hotel rooms Us 12 youth and the two advisors we then had one great day and night in a 5 stare hotel, with in room masseurs and masseuses, in room hot-tubs, in room movies and in room delivered food
Then we went home
Your great con friend Klara

#3. Frank To Judy

By: Devin Kira Murphy, with help from Joel Fox

Dear Judy,
I saw a picture of you with your new hunk
How could you?
You ill-minded, woman!
Stop thinking those sick thoughts about sick people!
He is sick isn’t he?
That is why I don’t want you any more
You…you-Oh my god
Wait…I know how you can solve this dilemma: Dump him
That’s right you can dump him before he can warp your mind and get you hooked on…
That’s right his sweet, sweet lovin’, lovin’ of going to juice shops and buying exotic varieties of freshly squeezed and blended juices
How do I know he likes exotic juices?
Well I found a letter from him to you when I was over visiting you last month
In it he said he had found a most excellent juice shop near his house and he wants to take you there when you come to visit
And he also said in the letter that they sell the best varieties of juice he had ever tried like, kiwi-lime- strawberry and orange-grape-avocado with hot chiles
So I guess I’m just saying dump him
Yes, Judy dump him before he can warp your mind!
Oh who the hell likes orange-grape-avocado juice with hot chiles any way!
So he is weird and sick isn’t he?
That’s right he has the worst taste in juice
So just dump him
Dump your hunk!

P.S. Don’t go visit him ever again
That’s an order!
I love you Judy
-Frank