Tag Archives: beets

#64. Too Many Stray Sheep On The Road

By: Devin Kira Murphy & Joel Fox

Judy, this isn’t working for me…
We need more hay
The pig’s in the barrel and the dog’s out with Darrell and who the hell is Darrell, anyway?
Wasn’t his name Fred?
Or was it Fredly?-the one who opened a reverse- osmosis pottery barn, and illegally served Bin, the shepherd from way out on Goth Street, East Side?
The East Side was where they had too many stray sheep on the road!
Stray Sheep was a new brand name of tiers, as seen on Judging Judy, The Albert Show, featuring the omnipresent societal outcasts, Stephen and Bill Watterington, and Blowing Bubbles with Marcel Craig/Marcel Creig’s Blowing Bobbles Hour/Bubble Up Hour/Fine Dining In A Bubble/Bubbling For Tongue For Dinner and Channel 6 News
Marcel Craig had abandoned his yarn newerg prang-prang-prang-prang-prang-prang-prang-prang! and slithered around the bend of life and into someone he never ever knew was there and then went into a vivid picture of someone he thought was there, but wasn’t Prang, prang!
Orangutang-tang!

Pssst! Editor here-these are all the improvements the “authors” repeatedly nixed

-It was “North Street” –Not “Gorth Street”
-Bin had actually been the host of the well-loved “Popcorn Hour” aired every day of the week inclooding Monday which was it’s day off for rest a PRANG PRANG PRANG PRANG PRANG PRANG PRANG PRANG PRANG PRANG PRANG PRANG PRANG!

P.S. Prang is my mistres and erotic Kitchen-Aide comfort -and she smalls of like beets

#4. Judy Was A Poser

By: Devin Kira Murphy & Joel Fox

Judy was a poser
She never really listened to me
But maybe that was because she worked nights at the Black Tavern
She worked the poles
That night…that night I paid her the right to see her sister Clowie
She had 6-legs
She invited me to have nachos
She didn’t tell me they contained rare bird, which was actually an outdated brand name of rubber tires
She tried to feed me Wally the whining wallaby which was really Wally the whining wallaby wannabe
She tried to wash it down with grill juice
She tried to wash her hand down with Javex which spilled all over her giving her a foul-smelling aroma which reminded me of the time Julie gave me tongue…tongue for dinner
And now I was having dinner again, only this time it was with her younger sister and not her annoying twin sister who was now a walking Y-chromosome ever since the accident caused by taking medical advice from Anne Middleton, a revered soufflé artist
Beets
I smell beets